Laughs

 Page 69 of 93 (1860 quotes in this category)
If your name was homework, I'd be doing you on my desk right now...




If I got a nickel everytime someone said they hated me, I'd be broke as hell.

Stephanie Tucker




I love you like a fat kid loves cake.

50 Cents, 21 Questions




Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.




Erotic is using a feather. Kinky is using the whole damn Chicken!

95.1 The Nerve




Human brain has two parts: the right and the left. The left has nothing right in it and the right has nothing left in it .




The distant hills call to me. Their rolling waves seduce my heart. Oh, how I want to graze in their lush valleys. Oh, how I want to run down their green slopes. Alas, I cannot. Damn the electric fence! Damn the electric fence! Oh, how we long to run with a wilder herd. Alas, we cannot.

Birthday card




The French make two mistakes about me. They think I'm an intellect because I wear glasses and they think I'm an artist because my films lose money.

Woody Allen




A prostitute?s epitaph: ?At last she sleeps alone.?




A married couple celebrating their golden wedding anniversary decided to give each other?s gifts in the form of epitaph: The man wrote, ?Here?s my one and only wife, cold as ever.? The woman wrote, ?Here?s my one and only husband, stiff at last.?




That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.




Intelligence could be instinct which has it at the wrong end

Nikki de Coninck




It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it!

Old Chinese Proverb




Anyone who speaks german can't be evil

The Simpsons




It's about time that i teach you how to speak gooder English.

Mawaki




Why was Tigger looking down the toilet? He was looking for Pooh.

Juan Santos




I was standing in the park, wondering why frisbees got bigger as they came closer... then it hit me!




How can I sore like an Eagle when I'm surrounded by penguins.




I have PMS and a gun... now what were you saying?




Be nice to your kids, they choose your nursing home.

Bumper Sticker




01   02   03   04   05   06   07   08   09   10  
11   12   13   14   15   16   17   18   19   20  
21   22   23   24   25   26   27   28   29   30  
31   32   33   34   35   36   37   38   39   40  
41   42   43   44   45   46   47   48   49   50  
51   52   53   54   55   56   57   58   59   60  
61   62   63   64   65   66   67   68   69   70  
71   72   73   74   75   76   77   78   79   80  
81   82   83   84   85   86   87   88   89   90  
91   92   93  
Next Page >>