Human Laws

 Page 8 of 18 (353 quotes in this category)
When everything is right nothing is left.




All wisdom ends in paradox.




The best thing about humanity is humans. The worst thing about humanity is humans. Humanity is a paradox of contradictions.




The amount of time since the last time you saved your document is directly proptional to the chance of an error occuring and lossing the document.

Thomas F. Clauss III




No matter which train you are waiting for, the wrong one arrives first.

Meditz Subway Postulate




Never sneeze while leaning your head against a brick wall.

John Morrison Raymond, III




Never fry bacon in the nude.

H. Peter Miner




Small change can often be found under seat cushions.

Lazarus Long, "Time Enough For Love" by Robert Heinlein




Cheops' Law: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.

Lazarus Long, "Time Enough For Love" by Robert Heinlein




Any organization is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels. Some monkeys are climbing up, some down. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.

COOL!




Statistics are like bikinis, what they conceal is more important than what they reveal




Nothing is so simple it can't get screwed up.




Smile... it confuses people.

Cassie




"Being popular is like being in a crowded elevator: you are just a fart away from being hated."

braxton fart theory




Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.




Dog Property Laws:
  • If I like it, it's mine.
  • If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
  • If I can take it from you, it's mine.
  • If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
  • If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
  • If it's broken, it's yours.

Katie Santo




"Live it up, drink it down."

Brian Kramer




We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.

Aristotle




History is written by the winners.




You can paint a turd red, but it's still a turd.

Jason Bray




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